Reader Revolt!

Response to their plights was thunderous—and
less than sympathetic. Thanks to everyone for writing. Here’s just a sampling
of the firestorm…

First target, Scott —

Sean Kennelly fires away:

As a former cast member, father and life-long Disney fan, I have never felt a need to respond or comment on your column or other letters, but I have one question to ask: does Scott McKenna have children? Has he ever been a child under 7?

For him to make such unfeeling comments as “Every time I get a stroller rammed into my heels, shins or ankles, I find myself thinking, “Wouldn’t this situation be better for all concerned if you waited until your child was about 7” tells me how much he loves the very people Disneyland was created for: children of all ages. Sure kids don’t last the whole day and they do have an occasional meltdown (sometimes the parents do too), but if you ever saw how absolutely excited a child can get to be in such a wonderful place, you’d gladly march from dawn to dusk to see that little bit of magic.

It isn’t the long, hard day of marching behind a stroller that ever gripes me, it’s the “big kids” who are so self-centered that they forget to watch out for anyone else including strollers and wheelchairs. It is hard to push a stroller and stop on a dime when someone inadvertently steps right in front of you or stops unexpectedly. Sometimes you can stop and sometimes you can’t. I know I always apologize if it ever happens, but Scott makes it sound like such accidents are the evil design of a maniacal adult bent on pushing his kids into every paying guest on the property and then some. I’m sure that wasn’t his intent, but can I make a plea for the little kids? Be a little more tolerant and understanding. Our little ones love the magic just as much as you do.

Thanks for letting me vent. I just think it’s a shame that anyone could be so self-concerned that they worry about someone else’s kids ruining their Disney experience. If small kids and their strollers are a problem for you, go to Six Flags.

Layne and Rosalie Shelley shoot next:

I would agree that at times in Disneyland strollers and cranky kids can be aggravating. However, I would not wish this away. These families are trying to build memories; hopefully, the good outweigh the bad.

We have a 3-year-old who has been coming with our family to Disneyland since she was 3 months old. She loves the place and rarely has a problem. She is outgoing and fun; she is not afraid to try new things or afraid of any ride. She studies the map of Disneyland and knows the rides and which ones she loves the best. I think part of her vivaciousness and fun personality is because she has been able to adapt so well to our family vacations. Our children’s ages are spread out enough that in order for her to be 7 (as was suggested) for her first visit, our twin boys would be 16, and our other daughter would be 12. I would rather have them spend the time with her now, than hope that they will want to go at these ages.

Also, one of our boys has a disability. At times when we go to Disneyland and things get a little overwhelming he has had a “meltdown.” He would melt down at home or anywhere not just at Disneyland when feeling anxious or overwhelmed. Disneyland has been good for our family because it is a place where everyone can be good at riding and having fun. Disneyland puts my disabled son on equal grounds with his brother and there isn’t the constant “competition” or “comparison” that occurs as a part of regular life.

When we take our family to Disneyland we see much growth and maturity occur in our son. It forces him to experience new and good things that are out of his comfort zone. If we waited until he was “meltdown-free” that might be years away or possibly even never. I wouldn’t trade the great times we have had there or what we have gained as a family. Our other children are able to handle the disabilities of our son better because they are able to have fun with him, play with him, and see all the normal things that can happen with their brother.

We try and keep things together, we try to have in place ways to help diffuse the situations but if melt down occurs we are sorry for any inconvenience that it may cause other guests. Please know that we are trying our best to deal with any situations, but also that it is important for us to still maintain some sense of a normal vacation for our family.

Jennifer Savage weighs in:

I happen to have a 4-year-old and a 2-year-old. They both love the parks. They love the rides. They love the characters. They love the parades and the fireworks. They love the food.

Do they get tired out mid-way through the day? Sure. Even at home, they take naps for a couple of hours a day. Can they spend the entire day walking around the parks at the same pace as an adult? Of course not. They have small legs. Strollers help them to last longer during the day, provide a place for them to rest and sleep at nap time, and help us parents keep track of our precious young ones.

I can sympathize with the pain of being rammed by a stroller, having been rammed more than a few times myself, but I will tell you that people in theme parks are particularly inconsiderate of strollers and wheelchairs. They often cut them off or run into them. Once I had a man nearly knock over my son in his stroller by walking right into the side of it (even if it hadn’t been there, he would have been cutting me off), then curse at me as if it were my fault.

As for tantrums, I don’t think there is a magical age where people outgrow them. My 14-year-old still has them occasionally. Should I keep her out of the parks so as to not detract from your enjoyment? For crying out loud, it’s a theme park, not the opera.

Walt Disney designed Disneyland for families to enjoy together. If having children in the parks annoys some people, I can only say I feel sorry for them.

Maybe the next time you’re at Disneyland, Mr. McKenna, you should stop for a moment and watch a young child whose face lights up when he gets on a train, or sees Mickey, or rides the carousel. And I’ll make you a deal. If you’ll try to be more courteous of people pushing strollers, I’ll do my best to not inadvertently bark someone’s shins with mine.

Carl Jimenez adds:

I’d like to throw in my two cents on the subject of waiting until children are “old enough” to behave themselves at Disneyland. As a parent of a 4-year-old, my theory is that experience is the best teacher. I believe that the best way for someone to learn how to handle any situation is for them to be exposed to that situation.

For example, we’ve taken our son to the movies since he was probably about a year old. He occasionally made a fuss, but that’s why we sat on the end of the row, so we could quickly take him out to the lobby to calm/quiet down. Now at age 4, he’s a seasoned veteran in the theater. He knows how to sit quietly and enjoy a film. On the other hand, we recently went to a movie with friends who had a child about the same age who was not a frequent moviegoer. This kid was in and out of his seat, roaming the aisles, talking aloud, and barely noticed that there were other people around.

Well, needless to say, I think that the same applies to any number of public situations, from eating out at a restaurant, attending a play, or visiting Disneyland. While you may have the occasional problem, there is no substitute like experience. In the long run, it’s better for everyone.

Gina Jones notes:

First, indeed it is normal behavior for a 4-year-old to throw a tantrum. It can happen at The Happiest Place on Earth and it can happen the grocery store. This reality, however, does not keep me out of grocery stores or Disneyland with my kids. “To pass the tantrum phase” is an interesting idea considering I have seen at Disneyland adults having tantrums and once, even a cast member. So at what age would that be?

Second, is Scott suggesting that families exclude small children from family vacations because they are under 7? Keep them home with a sitter while the rest of the family enjoys a vacation at Disneyland? I personally would never treat my kids in such a way. He must not be a parent.

I have enjoyed Disneyland since I was 4 and so have my kids. And, yes, I even used a stroller.

I think Scott is missing the spirit of Disneyland and that it is for “kids of all ages.” Lighten up, Scott.

Todd Alden chimes in:

I won’t condone letting kids throw tantrums with out regard for
the other people trying to enjoy the parks. Parents, as with everyone,
need to be considerate of others. But…

Can you just imagine Disney with no kids under 7? It would be a shame.

Yes, little kids get tired, they throw tantrums, they can cry and
whine and generally be annoying at times. But the other times, ah, the
other times, they are capable of expressing sheer joy unlike anyone
else. They approach everything with a straight forward innocence. I’ve
met very few 4-year-old cynics (but have met some 7-year-old ones).
Little kids experience Disney with true wonderment. I maintain the best
way to see Disney is with a 4-year-old. Just seeing how they react with
their wide eyes and lots of “ohs,” “ahs,” and “look
there there’s Snow White!” is the best way to help us “old
folk” (7 and up) take in the park like it is our first time again.

Yes, you have to realize that they are still very young. You can’t take on Disney “commando-style” with a 3-year-old. Get them a stroller so they can rest their feet (and sleep when they need to). Take them back to the hotel for some quiet time during the day and don’t keep them up till midnight.

To all those parents out there wondering if they should take their 3-to 6-year-old to Disney, I’d like to quote one of my favorite series of Disney planning books: (talking about the Dumbo ride) “Go for it. If you aren’t the sort of person willing to invest an hour of agony for two minutes of joy, you probably shouldn’t have had children in the first place.” [Disneyland & Southern California, with Kids (2nd edition), Kim Wright Wiley, Prima Publishing, 1993.]

Karen Cinnamon writes:

I have two children, 2-1/2 and 11 months old, and as annual passholders we try to visit Disneyland a couple of times a month. When I tell my children that we are going to Disneyland they get so excited they can hardly sleep the night before. Waiting until children are age 7 and above to visit the park is absurd. Our children never fuss, have tantrums, or complain while we are there. They do at home occasionally but never at Disneyland; it’s as if they know it is a magical place.

Why do we as parents subject our children to this activity? Because we love Disney, and it is a great place to enjoy as a family. No, we can’t do all the rides and we take things slower than we used to when it was just my husband and I, but to hear my 2-year-old sing “It’s a Small World” and watch my 11-month-old dance to the music on the ride is a special treat.

Watching their reaction to seeing their favorite characters is absolutely priceless. My son still talks about the day Minnie gave him a flower and Goofy pushed him in the stroller and that occurred four months ago.

Disneyland is a place for all to enjoy and I don’t doubt that some parents push their kids too far. But as for this family we will be there with our double stroller enjoying every minute of it. In fact, we’re headed there tomorrow.

I hope, Scott, that when you have children you don’t deprive them of such a wonderful place.

Disney Bert adds:

I have three little girls. Each one of them has been to Disneyland
at 1 year of age, and it was nothing but fun. My husband and I went
with them with the UNDERSTANDING that they were very young, would need
frequent breaks, and that we’d need to rest when they needed it. We
used the Baby Center, and kept track of the last time our children were
changed, got a drink, got a chance to run around, had a nap, etc. Not
once have they ever had a “Disney meltdown.”

The problem is simply a matter of parenting. I remember standing in line in Toontown, waiting for our chance to hug Donald, and watching kid after kid try to yank the Christmas scarf that was around his neck. No one acknowledged the actual person; they kept saying, “Look this way! Put your arm around him!”.

When it was my children’s turn to see Donald, I said to them sternly, “ASK Donald to please sign your book. And say please and thank you. Only show respect to the characters.” Donald stopped mid-hug, and threw his arms around my neck. He also gave me one of those audible kisses. It was very sweet, but made me sad. Shouldn’t everyone respect the characters?

George Burnash says:

Having taken my then 4-and 6-year-old to Disneyland last September for four days, I think that I’ve got a little experience here to be able to speak on the subject.

In so many ways that age is a perfect age to be able to experience Disney for the first time. Pure joy was watching Mickey walk my two children from Main Street to the castle on their very first entry to the Magic Kingdom, and it is a memory that will be with them for a lifetime. And one that will mean so much more to them at this age than it would when they are more jaded at the age of 10.

But a full day is a lot to expect out a child that age, and shouldn’t be. That’s why we made large use of an age old tool that a lot more people would be wise to use—the afternoon nap! Every day at around 2:00 or so, we made our way back to our hotel (right next door to the park) and both kids and parents laid down and rested for a couple of hours. Then all of us were more than refreshed and ready for an evening at Disneyland once again.

I am happy to report in all four days there was not one tantrum, argument, fight, upset or even a tear shed (except maybe in happiness). And I’m firmly convinced that in large part it was due to the rest periods we took each day. Now if only everyone would do that.

Anna snaps:

If you don’t like the issue of kids and strollers then you shouldn’t
be going to Disney World or Disneyland. You know perfectly well they
will be all over the place. There is no such thing as a “proper”
age to go to such a place. There are older kids, teens and adults that
throw “tantrums” as well. If you don’t like the kids, strollers,
tantrums, etc., then don’t go. Don’t go anywhere, because the same thing
can happen at the malls, too.

My 4-year-old enjoys Disneyland. He may need a nap or he may not. Most the time he doesn’t, but if he does he is welcome to it, and when he wakes he will be full of energy and ready to go for more. Just because a child needs to nap or throws a “tantrum” doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy the time there.

I don’t enjoy Disneyland when I have to hear complaints from people or when I have a smoker that can’t wait and go find the smoking section and those rude adults, teens, or older kids that have be pushy, cussing, loud and stupid about what they do. Disneyland is a FAMILY place. What do you expect when you go to a family place? You are to expect a high number of stroller-bound kids. I don’t see many that are cranky or sleeping, though. I have probably come across more adults lying on benches or sitting on them sound asleep than I have kids sleeping or acting cranky.

I think everyone needs to just remember what Disneyland is for and stop complaining. Walt Disney built this amusement park for families to go somewhere with their kids that was family friendly. If you don’t like it, too bad because that is what it was meant for.

Bryan Walton writes:

Every parent has to judge for themselves when their child is ready to appreciate a day at Disneyland. We took our children the first time when they were around 2. We did this with the understanding that we would go at their speed, not subject them to things they wouldn’t enjoy or couldn’t appreciate and take them home before they could get too tired or cranky.

In fact, we just watched the video last night of our oldest son’s first trip to Disneyland when he was 28 months old. We had a delightful time. When he got a little tired or fussy, we stopped and relaxed, gave him something to eat and he perked right up. We made sure he was well covered with sun screen and were careful not to run into any other guests with the stroller.

Having been a Disneyland cast member for several years in the late ’70s and early ’80s and a frequent guest before and after, I’m convinced that children of almost all ages can enjoy and appreciate Disneyland in a magical, age-appropriate way if their parents are considerate of them and of the guests around them.

Jean agrees:

This is certainly a controversial subject! We’ve taken our children from the age of six months on trips to Walt Disney World and Disneyland. We have a great time without inconveniencing or disturbing anyone involved—parent, child or other guests. Just spend fewer hours in the parks, keep regular nap and meal schedules, and provide sensible food. If a child gets cranky from heat or boredom, you leave and go swim/play/rest at your hotel.

Out of the last 10 trips we’ve taken with a stroller, I’ve only
bumped someone’s ankle once, and that was on purpose because they were
cutting me off very intentionally and waving a cigarette at my
son’s eye level. By the way, the above suggestions should be used by
some adults I’ve seen in the parks, too.

Clyde Ireland advises:

We all know that Walt Disney built this park for children and adults of all ages. He would roll over in his grave if people were to ever think that children under a certain age don’t belong in the park. That simply strikes at the heart of what Disneyland is all about: catering to the child in all of us, even when that child is 2 years old.

I will agree that misbehaving children pose a problem to those of us (with or without children) who wish to enjoy the day at the park. However, the responsibility does not lie with the 2-year-old to correct this problem; the responsibility lies with the parents. We’ve taken our 4-year-old to Disneyland three times now, and will be making our fourth trip this week. We also have a 2-year-old who will be making his second trip there. What many parents fail to do at the park is schedule the day around the physical, emotional and psychological needs of the child. I wish I had a dollar for every time we saw an obviously over-amped or exhausted toddler out of control in the park. In our family, we mandate a mid-day trip back to the hotel for some R&R. If the children are too cranked up, we take them on a long, dark, somewhat quiet ride like Pirates. The cool air and darkness almost certainly conks them out by the end of the ride, or at least calms them down.

A parent cannot change the psychological and physiological makeup of a child. Trying to force a child through a torturous afternoon full of sensory overload and exhaustion is a lesson in futility. Unfortunately for many guests, it’s not a lesson some parents wish to learn. But is that the child’s fault?

And best of all, Robert Chinn, echoing my own childhood, writes:

As a parent, I am always concerned about how much my child can handle and always desire to see him behave properly in all situations. That said, I disagree with Scott McKenna’s disagreement over the appropriate age for children to best enjoy amusement parks.

Tantrums are the normal ebb and flow of childhood, in any given situation; Disneyland is just another situation. Disneyland is exciting, but it’s tiring; it appears to be a limitless fantasy, but there are limits. This is why the young ‘uns take a nap in the stroller, and this is why parents scold children in the Happiest Place on Earth. A tantrum is one indicator that, among other things, rest or discipline is needed. I believe that a part of the Disneyland experience—really, any experience—is dealing with this ebb and flow of childhood.

To the point, is Disneyland a place only for those who have moved beyond tantrums?

I draw on my own experience as a kid. My family maximized their annual trip to Disneyland—we couldn’t afford more than one trip a year even though we lived locally. We would arrive at 8 a.m. and left well after 1 a.m. Were we beat at 4 in the afternoon? You bet. Was I cranky? Undoubtedly. Do I recall my parents ever wanting to leave early? No friggin’ way.

And I’m glad they didn’t. Here’s why: My fondest memories of these trips include the car ride to Anaheim, Hungry Bear burgers, lines, parades, jumping into line at Space Mountain at 12:58 a.m., and the quiet trek back to the Main Gate after the security guard gave us no other choice. I have vivid memories of the “last ride” on the parking lot tram and the cool night air under the crackling electric towers. As far back as I can remember (say around 4 or so), my family always stayed as long as we could, as often as we could. I have to believe that my son, and, perhaps, most kids feel the same way.

Disneyland is best experienced in the age of wonder: The age where Sleeping Beauty’s castle rises majestically over the swans, the Matterhorn is the tallest mountain in the world, the Haunted Mansion is scary, Injun’ Joe’s ghost is in that cave, and the Autopia is busier than the 405. To limit Disneyland to those who have grown out of the age of wonder is doing the park and the disbarred a disservice.

I go to Disneyland, wander the paths of my growing up, remember the wonder of my childhood, indulge myself in the “Architecture of Reassurance.” I believe this to be the case for many of us, but remember, it is only as kids that we first experienced this wonder. Are we to deny this to the next generations?

---

Your turn, Wyatt —

Keith sets his sights:

It had been quite a few years since I worked at Disney, when I got the bug to work at a theme park again. It’s can be stressful, grueling work, but it can also be rewarding. I missed working with the public, and “creating magic” for guests. So I took a part-time job at another park (Disney parks were geographically out of the question). I still have moments when I see a guests’ eyes brighten as I bring an unexpected bit of magic into their day. But more often, I encounter the “Wyatts” of the world.

As it happens, I work on a ride with a particularly high number of ride restrictions, some of which are inconvenient or don’t make sense to guests (just as the requirement that children must be 3 years or older to wear the 3-D glasses didn’t make sense to Wyatt). I can understand and empathize with the guests’ concerns and frustrations, but the fact is, rules are rules—and no amount of cajoling, arguing, lying, or other tricks intended to circumvent the rules are going to change them. All such tactics do, is place the guest in danger (if they do manage to circumvent the rules, as Wyatt did) and set the stage for far less magical experiences for every guest who follows. Committed as a cast member may be, we’re all human, and we can take only so much abuse before it affects our attitudes.

I hope that the Wyatts of the world will stop and consider for a moment that the cast members are doing their job. They’re not out to unnecessarily restrict guests’ activities or enjoyment. They get no joy from confrontations. They are simply enforcing rules designed for the guests’ safety and comfort. What’s more, they may not have time to explain the reasons behind the rules. I, for example, must load upwards of 30 people in as little as 15 seconds. I count on guests to cooperate, not argue with me and slow down the process for everyone.

I hope Wyatt (and others like him) will consider the bigger impact of his boorish behavior. You always have a choice—accept the ride or attraction’s restrictions, or do not attend.

Ride operator “Attractions 87” gripes:

Assuming Wyatt’s account of the events as completely true and accurate, Wyatt was, unfortunately, completely wrong in this instance. HISTA does indeed have a rule regarding the glasses in that anyone under 3 “should not” wear them. Notice that this rule does not say that they “may not.” When Wyatt “insisted” that the child be given the glasses, the attractions operator should have given them to him/her.

Now, why does this make Wyatt wrong? Remember, Wyatt was told in no uncertain terms that “glasses can permanently damage children’s eyes who are under 3.” Now, this is actually untrue. The problem is that the glasses can easily break and scratch and cut a child or even gouge their eyes. It is for this reason that the glasses are not recommended for children under 3.

The fact that Wyatt’s child had used them before is completely irrelevant. The child was lucky that he didn’t get hurt.

The problem here is that the parent knew the glasses were
dangerous and even went so far as to lie (“Giving her one
more chance, I said to her that I made a mistake on my son’s age, and
that he was really 3”) in an attempt to obtain a potentially dangerous
article for his/her child.

Frankly, this seriously angers me. I see far too many times irresponsible parents like Wyatt deliberately putting their child in harms way for whatever silly reason I can not imagine. It was just a movie. The child was so young he probably wouldn’t even understand what was going on.

Often, I hear arguments of, “Well, he’ll just taken them from me.” Come on! Who’s the parent here?! These people like Wyatt are the same ones who take children who are too small for rides like Space Mountain and insist they be let on, fully knowing that the safety system won’t hold them.

If I had been there and Wyatt’s child had been hurt, I would have
made two phone calls. One to CFA and one to Child Protective Services
as Wyatt had deliberately exposed his child to danger. Over-reacting?
Probably. But parents need to start acting like parents not children
themselves. Any parents reading this, listen very carefully: Disneyland
has over 50 things to do (and DCA over five). If your child is too small
for something, there are many, many other things for them to do and,
believe me, your child will get over any trauma they might experience
by missing something.

The safety procedures put into place at Disneyland weren’t put there to annoy you. In all honesty, we hate turning people away. We see the disappointed faces, too. We don’t like that. I carry TGS forms (they’re called No Strings Attached now, aren’t they?) on me at all times so I can do something for a child who is crying because they’re not tall enough for their favorite ride. But I will not ever compromise on safety. And shame on any of you that insist that I do. Some people just shouldn’t be parents.

Another reader barks:

No one should apologize to reader Wyatt. In his letter she admits to being a liar and a cheat. I would prefer he leave the park when I am there.

Kelly says:

I don’t think that cast member was particularly rude; it seems to me that the guest was being a little too pushy. Grabbing some spare glasses, and proceeding into the theater when a cast member was telling you to come back, is not acceptable behavior, as far as I am concerned. (A child who is 2 is practically a baby, anyway, and wouldn’t understand what is going on in the attraction, and probably wouldn’t notice if they had glasses or not.)

People need to lighten up. Rules can change at any time; the cast members should be listened to and their instructions followed, for everyone’s safety, no matter what you read in the printed brochure. Later, if you have a complaint, you can give it to the appropriate person.

My point in bringing this up is that I think you should address this next time: tell everyone that you don’t endorse or recommend that people ignore cast members’ instructions and just barge off wherever they want to go.

Ed Ober echoes:

As a former cast member, I cannot help but get annoyed at the guest who complained about her child being too young for Honey I Shrunk the Audience. That person should not have complained and argued with that cast member. It is nice to read about a cast member doing their job for once. It is quite sad when it is the cast members who care more for the child’s safety than the parent. I can’t even tell you how many times I got yelled at for not allowing a small child ride Gadget’s Go Coaster. I’m sorry, but is a lifetime of pain worth 45 seconds of enjoyment?

Sure, the guy may say he’ll take responsibility for his son. But once something bad happens, it’s all our fault. Guests scream about where is the concern for safety when something like the Roger Rabbit incident happens. But when we do something as simple as what that cast member did, we get an earful about it. As for the attraction being dangerous, it’s only dangerous for stupid guests like him. I will never forget what veteran cast members used to tell me. Guests lose their brains the moment they enter the main gates.

Finally, Pete notes:

We recently took our two 4-year-old girls to Disneyland and DCA for a four-day vacation and had a wonderful time. We absolutely loved both parks.

Though my girls are twins, one is a little shorter than the other and measures in at about 40 inches in her shoes. We knew this was close to the height restriction for some rides, but she was measured and allowed onto Space Mountain and Star Tours. Then we got to DCA where Molly (the shorter girl), very much wanted to go on Jumping Jellyfish. We were not sure why she got fixated on this particular ride, but boy was she excited when we got there. A cast member measured her before we got in line and said she was tall enough. Great. We waited about 15 minutes in line as she watched in rapture as the jellyfishes went up and down. When it was our turn to go on, another cast member decided to measure her again and pronounced that she was not tall enough for the ride.

Now, I’m not one to argue with these things. But Molly just collapsed in tears. She was utterly devastated that she couldn’t go on the one ride she was looking forward to. Of course, if they find her too short she should not go the ride. But what was disturbing to me was that they had already measured her and pronounced her tall enough. If at the beginning of the ride (before we got in line and before she waited for 15 minutes for her turn) they told us she was too short we would have whisked both our daughters away from there and made up some white lie why they couldn’t go on. Waiting until just before they go on the ride to measure them is unnecessarily cruel.

The rest of the trip was nice, so I am chalking this up as an anomaly. Hopefully, though, they will get this figured out in the future so other little kids don’t have to go through this kind of disappointment.

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